Candidates and Initiatives That Just Might Cause Me to Have a Mental Breakdown if Elected or Enacted

by Latina Fatale on 11/02/2010 · 0 comments

in Politics

Here are a few races and initiatives that might send me spiraling into a fit of rage if these jackasses are elected or enacted:

  • Meg Whitman: It’s obvious why. I stopped listening to a damn word she said when her whole platform in the primaries was all about “illegal immigration”. Let’s  move forward already, bitch.
  • Abel Maldonado: I don’t take lightly to brown ass men with a nopal on the forehead telling us that he will fight to deport “illegal aliens”. Someone needs to be deport his ass if Meg Whitman wins.
  • Carly Fiorina: I pretty much have an aversion to conservatives, but I also couldn’t stand her from the moment that I read her autobiography years ago and she claimed that there is no glass ceiling for women (while at the same time detailing all of the shit that she was forced to go through as a woman in corporate America, like having to do business in a strip club, outdrink men over a deal, and put socks in her pants to impress the men that she had bigger balls than them). Get a damn grip.
  • Civil Rights Initiative Prop 107 in Arizona: This initiative takes away equal opportunity for women and people of color. They pulled this scam in California and people ate it up, but when will noncrazy people in Arizona say that enough is enough and stop the fullblown assault on people of color??
  • The English initiative in Oklahoma. It’s obvious that English is the dominant language, idiots, and enacting this proposition (as they did in California in the 80s) is only a symbolic act to exert white supremacy. How do the Native Americans in Oklahoma feel about that? It’ll probably pass because me imagino que hay muchos hillbillies allá.
  • The “personhood” initiative in Colorado, which is nothing but a stunt to begin the steps to set precedent to criminalize abortion. Stay the hell out of my uterus, yo. If you don’t like abortion, then don’t fucking have one, but I should have the right to have one if I need to. If you vote for this prop, hopefully one of Christine O’Donnell’s covenant sisters will put a spell on your ass so that you or your wife will be in a situation one day where an abortion is necessary in a life or death situation. The next proposition that should be placed on the ballot (if this one passes) is that anyone who votes for it should have to pay enough taxes every year that will cover the cost of children who are living in orphanages. Sounds good to me-you don’t like abortion? Well, then pay to take care of a kid-oh, and let’s throw in the health care expenses for you to pay for the prenatal care and birth of the child.

I’m sure I’m forgetting something here. Oh, and if you are in California….vote yes on 19! Marijuana is already medically legal, and it’s not a felony anymore to carry less than an ounce….so why don’t we tax it!

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